Rage against the Mother Club

So I took the advice of friends and family seriously when it came to meeting others and trying to fit a group of friends here in our new town.  Most people told me to join a “mommy” group.  I was a little hesitant because in Huntsville, my friends were my friends because of our similarities.  Some had kids – some didn’t.  It didn’t matter either way though.  BUT- I’m up for joining groups if it helps me to meet people quicker.  For a few weeks, I was really put off that none of the groups would email me back.  Being a little prideful, I didn’t want to contact the same group twice – because come on – I don’t want to be begging for friends or anything.  The group that ended up contacting me back is called M@CC (I’m going to try and “code” the name because I don’t want someone looking for this group and landing in my blog) – Mothering as a C@reer Club.  A CAREER.  I….I just have so  many issues with this title.  First off – motherhood is not a career nor is it a hobby.  It’s not anything I was educated on, trained for, or am being paid at.  Therefore – NOT a career.  I think it’s more of a lifestyle choice if it deems such a title.  Joel didn’t really see why I was all up in arms about the  name of this group until our realtor asked if I found any groups to hang out with yet.  I said that I went to a playdate with the M@CC group.  She looked a little confused and I confessed that it was the “Mothering as a…*mumbled something incoherently*” She jumped in with “as a CAREER club – YES. Well.  I didn’t join that because I always had a career.”  And even though she did NOT mean this to  be mean or condescending, Joel immediately saw that why this title was so offensive to me.

I say all this to say that I have joined this group – except I haven’t done it officially because I haven’t paid my dues yet ($20/year) but I intend on joining.  They always send out an active monthly calendar that has multiple events every week so it offers a lot of freedom as to what events match up with Lila’s schedule.

I’m also saying all of this because last night I was pissed at this group.

There was a Mom’s Night Out scheduled for last night.  Even though I am an extrovert, I still am a little nervous about just showing up some place and being like HEY! Let’s hang out!  You know, because that’s weird. We finished dinner last night, I got all cute with HEELS and MAKEUP and HAIR.  I drove over to the restaurant where we were supposed to be having karaoke night (which I would not be participating in because I only karaoke once I REALLY know you.  That’s not first date material.) and hopefully having a few drinks.  I pull in the parking lot and was a little surprised by how empty the parking lot was.  Actually, it wasn’t empty but it was lacking a good number of SUVs and minivans.  So I walk in about 15 minutes late because I can’t be the new girl AND one of the first ones there but I don’t see any tables of women hanging out.  Except one.  It’s a booth with 4 women sitting at it.  I frantically called Joel and was like “Um, what do I do?!?” So I hung up and went over there and asked the first lady who  made eye contact with me if they were from the M@CC group.  She responded no and I frantically apologized and jetted back to the safety of my car.  I checked my email again for the 15th time that night but there was no response to my RSVP or any notice they had cancelled.

I called Joel and told him that I was on my way home but I was going to be stopping to get a milkshake and some onion rings first.

Emotions varied from annoyance to anger to sadness to bitter.  An actual thought I had – “Screw you b*#$^%@! I’ve got a milkshake and an episode of Dateline murder mysteries on my DVR – I DON’T NEED YOU.”  What is so frustrating is that because I haven’t paid my dues BECAUSE THEY KEEP CANCELLING THE EVENTS I GO TO (this is the second event cancelled that I was not notified about but thankfully didn’t go to the other one since it was a 45 min drive from my house) I don’t have any way of contacting anyone except for an email address to one girl who I like a lot but this is NOT OK.

She wrote me an email at about 1am that stated the event was cancelled (what?! no way!) and that she hoped I stayed home (nope!) since she didn’t email me back.  I’m just frustrated.  Frustrated with the lack of everything with this group.  This cannot be normal for mom groups, right??


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